Grumble.

I cannot imagine a time where I've been hungrier in my entire life. I think this is the third... no, fourth meal in a row that I have gone without.

Grumble.

"Yes, yes, I heard you the last five-hundred times," I replied.

Grumble.

"Please, go bother someone else! I've had enough of you!"

Grumble?

"Beat it!"

And just like that, it stopped. It was as if my stomach had given up on the thought of food, as if it knew that its pleas were useless. Now I walked in complete lonely silence down the street. It wasn't long before I started to miss the heated conversation I had with my belly. It even got to the point where I begged it to grumble just so I could have someone to talk to--to share my misery with.

A totally unexpected response occurred: Meow.

I gasped, afraid I had finally descended into the realm of insanity, but was relieved to see that behind me stood a small kitten. It was now that my stomach decided to re-enter the conversation, but this time, I only heard its low voice shout "Get him!" At that moment, I pounced at the cat, completely controlled by my starvation, yet the cat had sensed that something was strange and quickly evaded my grasp.

"Get back here!" I shouted, sprinting down the street after it. As I ran, I bent down and grabbed a handful of rocks, throwing one after the other at the bite-sized kitten. One actually managed to hit its target on the bounce, but the kitten survived the attack unscathed and scampered off into the graveyard. I stopped and gasped for air, disappointed that along with breakfast, an opportunity for lunch had been missed as well.

However, not long after I had caught my breath, I noticed a crowd of men outside the bakery across the street. They weren't very spectacular men, to be honest. Many had tattoos littered across their bodies and none of them looked very intelligent (trust me, when you walk the streets as much as I do, its an easy trait to spot in people).

Out of curiosity, I made my way over to the crowd to see what was going on. It was rather funny, because no one really seemed to notice me since I blended in so well. Before I could ask someone why there was a gathering, a man with a tense expression on his face (most likely the baker) opened the door to the bakery and beckoned the group in. Given this opportunity, I would have swiped some bread, had the baker not given me a loaf free of charge.

The group followed the baker into a different room, so I quickly took my leave, unnoticed and bread in hand. I was so excited that I almost dropped the loaf in the middle of the street! (Not that it would have mattered, I would have eaten it anyway!) I sunk my teeth into the hard crust and almost cried out for joy as the warm bread descended my throat to my deprived stomach, who no longer moaned continuously.

With high spirits, I walked back towards the park. The bus was just arriving at the bus stop, and only one man got off. He wore a cowboy hat with blue overalls and held a guitar in his right hand, displaying an extremely quirky smile across his face.

Its that kind of personality that gets you screwed in this city, I thought to myself. I wouldn't be surprised if I saw him out here on the streets sometime soon.

Without taking time for a second thought, I chomped into my bread and aimlessly continued walking down the streets of Washington Heights.